


Keep It Up

by Evil_Little_Dog



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Community: fma_fic_contest, F/M, Friendship, Phone Calls & Telephones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-22
Updated: 2012-08-22
Packaged: 2017-11-12 16:19:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/493224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evil_Little_Dog/pseuds/Evil_Little_Dog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary:  Ed gets a late night telephone call.<br/>Disclaimer:  Arakawa might not find this as amusing as I do.<br/>Prompt:  Erectile Dysfunction</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keep It Up

The telephone rang, shrill and incessant. Edward grunted, wishing he’d never agreed to installing one upstairs in the house; if it was downstairs, he figured he could’ve slept through it, but Winry had insisted. Of course, she could sleep through almost anything. Let it be one of the kids crying, though, she’d wake up in an instant. 

Dragging himself out of bed and down the hall, he picked up the receiver. “Whaddaya want.” 

“Ed?!” That accented voice could only belong to one person. 

“Ling, you know there’s a time difference,” Edward growled, “call back in about five – make it six – hours.”

“I am not calling back, Ed. This is important!” Ling’s accent thickened. 

Edward yawned. “I’m not one of your subjects and I will hang up on you.” 

Winry’s arms came around his waist from behind, her body warm against his spine. “‘Zit emergency?” she slurred. 

“No, it’s Ling.” Edward rolled his eyes. 

“Tell ‘im t’call back inna morning,” Winry yawned. 

“I did.” 

“This is important!” Ling yelled through the line. “Ed, I – I – I lost it!” 

He twisted so he could put his arm around Winry, pulling her against his chest. “Lost what?” 

“My prowess!” The shout was loud enough Edward pulled the receiver away from his ear. Winry winced, burying her face in his chest. 

“Ling, I’m gonna hang up.”

“You can’t! I – I lost it, Ed! I was there, and it was going good, and then it – it collapsed!” 

“What collapsed?” Winry asked, rubbing her ear. 

“Winry does not need to know!” Ling howled.

She grabbed the receiver away from Edward, frowning. “You woke me out of a sound sleep, Ling. I have little kids. I don’t get a lot of sleep. So you’d either better say what’s going on, so I can go back to bed, or I’ll rip the telephone out of the wall, and you won’t be able to talk to Ed for as long as it takes to get the line repaired. So talk,” she snarled. 

The line was silent for a few seconds, then Ling whined. “I…couldn’t…finish…pleasuring…someone.” 

“Oh,” Winry drew out the sound, turning to press her back against Edward’s chest, obviously settling in for a while. “You mean you lost _that_. Well, it’s a common occurrence for men your age.” 

“I’m younger than Ed!” Ling snarled. 

“That’s your problem, Ling. It’ll come back, just get some rest, eat right, and don’t take any weird remedies like ground-up buffalo horn; that doesn’t work.” Without waiting for an answer, she hung up the receiver. 

Edward kissed her cheek. “Why didn’t you tell him to have his partner give him a blow job? Always works for us.” 

“Because then he’ll call back every time he has a problem,” Winry yawned, “and I’m not having my sleep interrupted by a Xingese emperor every night.” She slapped Edward’s butt. “Go check the kids, and meet me back in bed.” 

“For fun times?” Edward asked, hopeful. 

Winry poked him. “Only if you can keep it up.”

 


End file.
